Choosing Sides

I wrote about a week ago about the lawsuit being brought against the cult where I was raised. Over the past week some of the reactions to the suit have made it back to me. My heart is broken as I hear about people choosing to side with men who covered up sexual abuse over the victims.

I have little to no contact with current members of the cult. A few months ago I attended a party with some current members, but other than that, I can't even remember the last time I talked to anyone from the group. Prior to my leaving, I spent a lot of time with many people there. Several of the groomsmen in my wedding were life-long friends from the group. My relationships were close. One of things that can easily be overlooked about cults is how much of your life is tied up in the group. It wasn't uncommon for the members to have their lives interwoven in every detail. You'd be hard-pressed to find more than a handful of people who aren't related in some way. Often times it is through marriage, but often it is also through blood. The group becomes your church, family (literally and figuratively), and in many cases there are financial ties. A lot of the people work together and for each other. The ties are so deep that leaving incorporates much more than disagreements in theology.

When so much is tied into and invested in a group, people develop an incredible capacity to deceive themselves.

If you were to meet most of the people in the group, you would like them. You would see them as decent, moral people. For the most part, your first impression would be positive. That is what is so striking about them being morally ambivalent to a criminal act that hardened criminals deem worthy of death.

It reminds me of a story I recently heard in a sermon on self-deception. Toward the end of World War Two George Patton rode into one of the concentration camps where the Nazis were trying to incinerate the bodies of thousands of Jews who had been held prisoner. They were trying to destroy the evidence. Upon seeing the bodies, Patton vomited. The next day Patton questioned the guards and the people of the town. Each person denied knowing about the concentration camp. Patton told the people of the town that regardless of whether or not they knew, the would be required to come to the camp the next day to individually bury the bodies. That night the mayor and his wife hung themselves. They left a note saying, "We didn't know, but we knew." If you would have met most of the people in that town, you would probably have a positive initial impression. The decent people of the town had the capacity to ignore the obvious truth of what was going on in their city.

For years the pastor of the cult not only knew about child molestors in the church. He even supported their ministries. Several young girls were abused because the man wouldn't do what was right. The man is dead, but the new leadership has not acknowledged the injustices of the past. Instead they have made excuses and tried to do spin control. And now the members of the cult are following the lead of their leaders. As I hear stories of decent people making excuses for their leaders and ignoring the abuse of their victims I am reminded of the mayor of the German town. I so hope their deep ties and investments to the group will stop clouding their judgment. What has been done is wrong. No excuses. No exceptions. No complexities. Children had their innocence stolen and it was covered-up by a self-professed apostle.

I pray that the members of the group will have their eyes opened to justice. I pray they will not be blinded by all of the ties they have to the group (whether financial, family, or even spiritual). I pray that real change happens through real repentance. Lastly, I pray that excuses like, "it wasn't the church's fault" and "it was a long time ago" will stop immediately.