Remembering Three Conversations

Obviously, my past has been on my mind lately. I have been in touch with some others who have left the cult. It has been inspiring to talk to others who have been given the gift of sight and freedom. As I have talked to my friends, I have been reminded of three conversations that really show some of the difficult roads cult members have to travel to leave.

As I was leaving the cult I saw one of their more admired members in a furniture store. The man is older and well respected by the group as well as by those of us who have left. I vaguely asked him if he ever struggled with all of the issues facing the group. He responded by asking, "Where else could I go?" The man had been so brainwashed into thinking the cult was the only place to find God's truth. He realized there were huge issues, but he realized he couldn't go anywhere else to be taught the doctrines of the cult.

A short time after I had left I asked my uncle if one of my cousins could spend some time with me. It was a long conversation, but ended with him making the statement that if it came down to my cousin's salvation or spending time with me, he would choose his salvation. Once again, salvation was tied to the exclusive doctrines of the group. Exposure to me would be exposure to doctrines contrary to what the cult teaches, so exposure to me had to be squashed.

The third conversation is one that took place with the current pastor. He graciously met me at Starbucks when I told him I had heard some troubling things and hoped they weren't true. He certainly didn't owe me that meeting. As the conversation progressed, it became pretty tense. He concluded the meeting with this, "Well, Danny, I can't ignore what you're saying because God even used a dumb-ass to speak to Balaam. I told him I had been called worse and he tried to assure me he in no way meant to insinuate I was a dumb-ass. This type of passive-aggressive behavior is one of the ways the leadership tries to manipulate their followers and dissenters.

I have replayed these conversations in my mind several times this week. There are many others that also come to mind. I think the conversations give a general overview of the fear, control, and manipulation people have to battle if they're going to leave the group. It isn't an easy or quick process, but the freedom is definitely worth the pain. I don't know of anyone who has left who misses the cult. We miss people. We miss family and friends. What we don't miss is the secret truths the group claims to have. We don't miss the fear, control, or manipulation. The freedom and the desire for others to have the freedom speaks to the overwhelming joy of having our chains removed.